The Perfect Design

Several weeks ago I was at stained glass class working on a pattern. What was initially going to be a 'quick sketch' soon turned into an extremely tedious, but very fun, line drawing. There wasn't anything particularly detailed about it; the pattern was far simpler than my previous one. This one was more technical, involving a lot more concentration and accuracy on my part.

Having completed one piece of stained glass, I now have an understanding of how it works. I set out to do my second one with a very clear concept in my head. I wanted to use a circle of glass for the centre and have it spiral out in a rectangular frame. The middle piece would be red, followed by orange, yellow, green, blue and purple.

I set to work with this drawing only to find it consuming the entire stained glass class session, minus the time taken to purchase the glass.

I was eager to start cutting glass the following week but as circumstances and prior plans would have it, stained glass class was put on hold. It was several weeks before I returned and during this time I was certain that the pattern was tucked neatly into the same package in which my chosen glass was wrapped.

It wasn't until last week that I realised the truth. I opened the package and the pattern was not to be found. It was lost, but for strange fragments in my memory where I can uncertainly place it on a bookshelf, in a bag, or sandwiched in a pile of paper. All of my searching has resulted in disappointment and thus I must accept that it is gone.

The difficulty with this is, I have convinced myself that it was Perfect. Of course such a thought is quite silly because I could probably have tweaked it here and there and if I put the same effort into a new one it will likely be an improvement. I seem to have convinced myself that it won't be something I can duplicate since it seemed just right as it was. I may be putting this Lost Pattern on a pedestal and it's an easy way for me to claim this as The Piece That Would Not Be if only because I'm stubborn and the thought of duplicating it is more frustrating than anything.

But these things happen and the glass is bought and paid for and awaiting it's purpose. I can't leave such stunning colours wrapped in paper for long, so I am once again embarking on the task of drawing a pattern...my own pattern, anew.

So once again I find myself ending an entry with the ever apt term: Such is life.