Monday, April 23, 2012

Get it together

Been busy this past week. Stuck in - if you will. Will be back to my regular blogging schedule next month. In the mean time, here's a little thing I drew. It was inspired by a phrase I heard someone use. I thought it was quite clever.

Monday, April 16, 2012

Victim Mentality

In my last blog post I asked people to share what their best job offer ever would be. The responses I go in my comments and through Twitter were really interesting. what I noticed as most striking was how many people were making that job offer for themselves.

This was really inspiring for me to see! I love the self determined mentality. The person who says, "This is what I want, now how am I going to make it happen?"

It's much preferred to the victim mentality of "Life sucks and always gives me a hard deal. If I had a better job/better boss/a partner/different partner/won the lottery/didn't live in this city etc. I could be happy."

Victim mentality is one of my biggest pet peeves and yet, I have a lot of compassion for people with this frame of mind. It must be hugely challenging to truly believe that life is the luck of the draw and that you have absolutely no control over what happens in yours.

I'm not saying that life doesn't take us on unexpected twists and turns. That is undeniable. I'm just saying that there are those who see the twists and turns as something to learn and grow from and those who think the twists and turns are out to get them. In some cases there's also the belief that the difficulties they face are unique to them and no one could possibly have it so bad. People with victim mentality really love one upping those around them.

My answer to that is let them win. "Congratulations! You win the most Miserable Human Being on the Planet Award. You may have your award. I'm going to go away and win something different. Something like the I Am My Own Best Boss and Self Employment Rocks Award or the Rain Makes me Smile and I like Dancing in it Award or the Gets Joy Out of Little Things Award."

The thing about people with victim mentality is having compassion for them doesn't mean giving into them. You can have compassion for someone without encouraging or joining their whinge-fest. In fact, by leaving behind the people we encounter with victim mentality, we are being extremely compassionate. You can only help someone as much as they're willing to help themselves. People with a victim mentality are likely to drain your energy and resources. Compassion starts with the self and you need to protect yourself from people who might 'steal' your joy.

So go forward with an open heart and mind and remember, life really is what you make it.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

The Best Offer Ever

I recently heard someone use the phrase "The best offer of your career". This got me thinking. 

It's quite a statement to make. Whether you have an established career or it refers to your working life in general, the 'Best Offer' has got to be pretty damn impressive. I began to consider what, for me, would be the best offer someone could make. 

1. A lifetime book deal whereby I am to write a book a year for the rest of my life and be guaranteed publication, regular world book tours and an income on which I can live comfortably - as well as being a Life Coach and giving talks on how to live a life you'll love. 

There were other variations and elaborations but this was the big one for me. 

Regardless, I found the entire activity really fun. It tapped into my imagination and also fuelled some ideas for the direction my life is going. I found it so enjoyable and positive that I wanted to share it with you. I think everyone should take some time to consider what the best offer of their career would be. 

If someone were to come to you right now and offer you your most ideal job, no strings attached, what would it be? How would you describe it? 

Please feel free to share below! This is a great way to get creative juices flowing. It's also a great way to see how you yourself can make that offer. Life really is what you make it and if you choose, you could sit down and say, "Alright me, here it is, an offer you can't refuse." 

By imagining what would be ideal, by letting yourself go there instead of being restricted by what you think you should do or what you think other people would expect you to do, you can start to find a direction in your life for which you have great passion and energy. 

So go for it! Write a comment with your Best Job Offer and who knows what doors it will open up for you. 

Monday, April 9, 2012

We are all connected

I am a huge fan of George Takei. He posts some really great stuff on his wall - most of it the sort of stuff that makes me laugh.

The other day he posted this video:


I think what I love most about it is that an astrophysicist is sharing the fact that we are all connected by the stuff that makes us up. Just like we're all connected by the emotions we have. Or we're all connected by the air we breathe.

When you look at the stars, feel big and remember you're not alone.

Hope you had a lovely long weekend.

Monday, April 2, 2012

Wear as many hats as you like!

I never considered myself a polymath. I've always thought that the word was meant for people with full blown careers and a single focus. I felt like the word was for someone more skilled or experienced.

But then I began to consider the definition. There are no hard and fast rules about who counts as a polymath and, as with any identity, how we define ourselves is entirely up to the us.

The Empress is all about creativity. 
Too often we let our self definition be limited by how the outside world perceives us. The result is letting other people limit the possibilities of what we can do.

In my life I have been (And in many cases still am) a babysitter, youth worker, project manager, retail employee, kennel technician, researcher, administrator, personal assistant, painter, workshop developer, speaker, animator, furniture builder, fundraiser, writer, graphic designer, social media expert, journalist, sculptor and now, life coach.

If that doesn't make me a polymath, I don't know what does!

Before you try on the shoes someone else has given you, pay attention to the pair you're already wearing.

If you've planned out a holiday from beginning to end, sorting all the itinerary of everyone involved, and it's successfully come to fruition, then you've got project management skills.

If you doodle in your spare time, or you doodle in meetings or while you're on the phone, you're a sketch artist.

If you like to figure things out for yourself and are really good at getting answers, you're a natural researcher.

Make your own list. Look at all the things you've done professionally but also personally. It doesn't have to pay the bills to be a worthy skill and it doesn't have to be specific to a single role or career. By writing it down you can see your talents and see just how awesome you are.