London Journal - January 7th 2011, One Year ago today

...Excerpts from my journal...

January 5th, 2010

Well, this is it! Nothing left to be done other than the disassembly of my bed, which I probably shouldn't do alone.

Delirium is sitting on my luggage, looking like her springs might be about to sprung. Just the two of us for at least another half hour.

Freshly fallen snow has covered up all the grit and grim from cars. I don't feel trapped by the weather though, as I normally would about this time of year. Soon I'll be in an entirely different climate. An entirely different city. And at the end of the month: Paris!

My life is about to change in an incredible way.

January 6th, 2010

... I like watching the water race across the plane window. Outside snow blankets the fields in white, criss-crossed with black highways. We're about to go above the pillowy clouds, obscuring the ground from sight. The horizon is soft and pink, blending to yellow and then blue.

My best friend cut off my rat tail last night...

January 7th, 2010

I've arrived.

I'm home.

*glee*

It's amazing how different life can be in a year. We are rarely ever doing the same thing on the same day a year later, but the shift can be so extreme it's almost startling. I love that about my journal. I love looking back year on year, seeing where I've been, seeing how I've grown, seeing how I'm always growing.

Why London? The big question.

Do I regret any of it? First, a clarification. Regret, to me, does not mean wishing something hadn't happened or that it had happened differently. Regret is acknowledging something I shouldn't have done and promising not to do it in the future. So the question of regret, to be specific, is would I upheave my entire life and move to an entirely new country again?

Good question.

I suppose I would, because I'm stubborn and nomadic and adventurous. If I make up my mind to do something it's because I've come at it from all angles and my heart and head are in on it full-on.

And what of the next year? I've been sorting out my general 2011 goals list (finish the Tarot Card project, hold a gallery showing, editing manuscripts, developing design skills) and plotting trips to the places I'd like to see.

But then there's the most important question. Not the question of the past nor the question of the future. The question of right here and right now, today, in this moment. Gotta say, it's pretty fabulous. It's been raining all day, staining the whole city a darker shade. I've been home ten minutes but my glasses still show signs of the steady drizzle as they are dappled with raindrops. I've just opened a card which arrived in the post sometime whilst I was out. It's from my best friend and includes a lovely, silly drawing of she and her partner decorating their tree. This is adding to my smile, which has been growing since my own partner sent me a text calling today my anniversary. I'd not really thought of it as an anniversary. Once she put the thought in my head though, it stuck. I decided it was cause for celebration so after the day job was done I went to Charing Cross road to treat myself to some art supplies.

Afterwards, on my way home on the tube, I was playing I-Spy with the colour purple and listening to music. The new art supplies leaned against my legs in their red and white bag. I watched a dread-headed guitarist down the car bobbing to whatever it was he was enjoying on his headphones. When the train reached Tooting Bec I took one of my business cards out and wrote on it:

What makes you dance so?

I walked down the car and handed it to him. He smiled, pulling his headphones out of his ears. I slid mine back on my head.

"Prince," he said, with a stellar smile.

"Fantastic!"

"What about you?"

"To be honest, I don't know what it's called," I don't, really. It was a song from one of many mix CDs my best friend has blessed me with over the years.

The next stop was his, but he before he had to get off he gave me a CD for his band and said to email them if I liked it.

I've just finished uploading the song to iTunes (It's pretty decent!) and must say, between getting a card from my best friend and the potential of a new friend, this moment is pretty awesome. Tonight I'm going to snuggle up on the couch with my girlfriend, a delicious dinner from Deliverance, and a good film all the while listening to the sound of London rain.

What Did You Read in 2010? - Part Two

Continued from previous entry...

July

The Places That Scare You - Pema Chodron

Whenever I've chosen to read a Pema Chodron book it's usually when I need to remind myself of my own inner strength and abilities to cope. By July being so far away from friends and family was beginning to wear on me. It takes time to make significant friendships and it feels all the more difficult in a city like London. You'd think the high density would mean an abundance of opportunities for me to make friends. I have always been very proud of being able to approach most anyone and start a conversation. All the conferences I'd been to in my youth, the trip I took to Australia when I was nineteen, the trip to Palm Springs in 2009, have all proven to me that I have no problem getting to know people and making new friends. London is a very different world though. The huge population is a mix of so many people from so many cultures and backgrounds it's like its own country.

Londoners travel in a bubble, eye forward, headphones on. Tourists are in their clumps, speaking all sorts of languages and there for the sites. Immigrants settle into pocket of communities where everyone speaks the same language, creating a miniature version of their own country. There is a sense of not having time, time to visit, time to get to know someone new, time to just hang out.

As a social butterfly this has often been a very scary place for me to be but a good way to remember to be my own best friend and not let the culture around me change my own beliefs about smiling at strangers, lending a hand and taking every chance given me to meet someone new.

Stephen Fry's Incomplete and Utter History of Classical Music - Stephen Fry

I quite like a lot of classical music but as most of it doesn't have lyrics I find it difficult to find the songs I like. I just know I like them. I like them a lot and listening to classical whilst painting is one of my favourite things to do. I decided I needed to get educated and as Fry is one of those people who seems to know quite a lot about quite a lot this book felt like the perfect choice! It was quite fun to read but I regret not writing down more of the songs he spoke of. I feel like it would have been more enjoyed as the BBC radio programme it was based on or with an accompanying CD.

August

Lamb - Christopher Moore

The third time I've read this book, which is one of my favourite books on the planet. I suggest it to everyone I meet and I don't doubt I will read again and again.

I chose to re-read it this time as it definitely is one of my 'Best Friend' books. I read books for comfort just like I drink tea for comfort.

September

Unseen Academicals - Terry Pratchett

Another classic from Sir Pratchett! This was one of his wizard stories, which are usually my least favourite, however, given that I had just experienced the World Cup whilst living in the UK, his take on football was brilliant to read! I love how, the more you read and the more you travel, the more hilarious his writing becomes as all the allusions and cultural references come out of the woodwork.

Somewhere Towards the End - Diana Athill

One evening my partner and I curled up together on the couch and watched a documentary about Athill, a woman I knew nothing about. Throughout the incredible documentary this book was referenced. My partner purchased it right away and I snagged it as soon as I could. I think this is one of those books that everyone can appreciate in some way. Finding a book written about the end of life is a rarity, especially in a society so terrified of death as ours. I have always appreciated that life is what we make it and the most inevitable fact we all must face is that we will die. Athill looks back on her life and reflects in an incredibly honest way, sharing her learned wisdom with gorgeous prose.

October

Remarkable Creatures - Tracey Chevalier

An incredible historical fiction account of the legendary Mary Anning, a fossil hunter in the 1800's who is credited with discovering the ichthyosaurus. This was more than just a look at Mary and her fossils. This is a comment on how such discoveries shook the foundations of a society that held women in low regard and religion in high. Mary Anning really is a Mighty Woman and I think more people should know her story.

I Shall Wear Midnight - Terry Pratchett

The fourth and final instalment of the Tiffany Aching collection. This was a great contributor to my decision to use a hare for my Judgment card.

The Bad Beekeepers Club - Bill Turnbull

Bill is one of a team of two on BBC breakfast. He and Sian never fail to delight me. This book is an account of Bill's experiences as a hobbyist beekeeper. I have always loved bees and reading this just gave me more reason to do so. Throughout this story Bill did manage to colour his beekeeping skills with a stain, but he does redeem himself and remains one of my favourite BBC personalities.

The Clocks - Agatha Christie

I'd not read any Christie for awhile so I felt like revisiting her. This was a particularly elaborate plot but it got me back into a Christie mood and was shortly followed by...

After The Funeral - Agatha Christie

I do love Poirot.

How to Practice - Dalai Lama

A wonderful referential piece of writing. I actually started reading this very early in the year, about January or so. I would pick it up occasionally, dip into a few pages and replace on the shelf until I felt the need to visit again.

November

Everything is Illuminated - Safran

I found this sitting on my partner's bookshelf. I had nothing to read and it was time for bed. I find it extremely difficult, if not entirely impossible, to fall asleep without reading. I picked this up and thought, "Why not?"

It's not the best book to start as one is planning to drift off to sleep. Initially I found it very disjointed and confusing, but as I began bringing it with me to read whilst on the train I found myself getting more and more wrapped up in it. Sometimes I'd be so engrossed I'd nearly miss my stop. It is an endearing and quirky novel and I'm not very interested to see the film adaptation.

Thank You Jeeves, The Code of the Woosters and The Inimitable Jeeves - P.G. Wodehouse

A delightful romp, reading Wodehouse. Quite fun. It did make me a bit envious of the 'idle rich' but if I had the money Wooster had I would be anything but idle.

The Elegance of the Hedgehog - Muriel Barbery

Sometimes you go out for a meal and find the entire experience utterly gorgeous. It's not just that the food was delicious. It was the setting, the attention to detail, the way the dish was presented and the fluidity of the service. Reading this was like enjoying a delicious meal of words. Barbery's style is poetic, smooth and rich. She pulls you into her characters through the language they speak and the appreciation they have for words and punctuation.

December

Johnny & the Bomb - Terry Pratchett

Another re-read, the last of the year. Once again I found myself without a novel just before bed. I first read the Johnny series when I was still in Junior High. It was a treat to get re-acquainted.

The Amazing Maurice & His Educated Rodents - Terry Pratchett

I love how Pratchett writes young adult novels. They're suitably dark and a credit to the intelligence of the reader. This story was an extra special treat for me as it was both entertaining and monumental. Upon completing this book I realised I have now read every Terry Pratchett novel to date. He is a credit to the craft and I admire his work more than words can express.

Sorting Out Billy - Jo Brand

Jo is an English comedian I discovered since crossing the pond. I was at a garage sale warehouse type place when I noticed this book. They had quite a few decent paperbacks and were selling them for a pound fifty for five. This deal was obviously too good to pass up so I began collecting titles off the shelves, this one being the first I selected.

I can't say I enjoyed it much. I do love Jo's humour but I think she makes a better stand-up comedian than an author.

Bridget Jones, The Edge of Reason - Helen Fielding

Another light read. I was looking to get into a chilled out head space in preparation for my parent's arrival. Upon completing this novel I found my journal entries began losing the use of first person pronouns. This only lasted a short wile and I'm not back to my usual way of writing.

The End of Mr. Y - Scarlett Thomas

Not nearly so light as the previous two books, this novel took me on a cerebral trip through the imaginary writing of a Victorian author and scientist. It was full of thought provoking snippets on evolution, creationism, quantum physics and philosophy. It was charmingly weird.

And finally...

A Spot of Bother - Mark Handon

I've had Handon recommended to me, but not this title. I am very glad I discovered it on the shelves with the book deal. This snapshot of the members of a family about to embark upon a wedding was both engrossing and amusing. I found myself wishing it would never end but also unable to put it down. I did finish it, on the 31st, in fact.

Not sure what the next year will bring. I have an idea of how many novels I'd like to read in 2011 but I know that I'm a busy person and between all the writing, painting and editing I do, not to mention keeping a day job and exploring London, I don't always spend as much time as I'd like with books. Still, we shall have to see, won't we?

What did you read in 2010? - Part one

Growing up without a television in the house meant my brother and I spent a lot of time reading. For me, having a new book to read is like making a new friend. I love getting to know a book over a cup of tea or curled up under a cozy blanket with a cat curled on my lap. I can't leave the house without my journal and a book as I never know when the urge to write will take me or a book will be required to pass the time.

Last year my dad announced that he had read well over 50 books in 2009. The year before his number was in the 60's and the year before that it was in the 70's. I've never really kept track of how many books I've read in a year but I can honestly say that I rarely go more than a day between finishing one book and starting another as the idea of not having a book to read makes me quite uncomfortable.

In 2010 I entered into a vague competition with my dad to see if I could match him book for book. I say vague because neither of us are particularly competitive and it's not really about how many books we could read but comparing what we had read and why.

I kept track of the books I read in a blue notebook, recording the title, author and a brief reflection on it. I wrote them down according to month. I think it's been interesting to look back on my year as reflected in the books I read, thirty-eight in total.

January

When Things Fall Apart - Pema Chodron

I adore Pema. She has been one of my greatest teachers. I have great respect for her and the teachings she shares with the world. When I read this book it was as I was adjusting to an incredible upheaval to my life. Born and raised in Calgary I was suddenly embarking on an entirely new way of life in a new country. I didn't have a job yet, nor very much money in the bank. Without my friends and family close at hand I had to rely very much on myself and on the support of my partner. I'm fiercely independent and sometimes this can be a detriment to my well-being. Reading this book acted as a reminder that being groundless is a great place to be as it will result in so much growth and change. It can be the source of inspiration and creation and should be seen as an opportunity. When things are at their most difficult is when we see where we need to change and where we are indestructible.

Nation - Terry Pratchett

An entirely whimsical, lovely tale, as only Sir Pratchett can create. His writing never ceases to bring me great comfort and fill my head with ideas for my own writing.

Walks In Hemingway's Paris - Noel Riley Fitch

A novel to accompany one on a trip to Paris. I began reading it a little before I myself embarked on the incredible London to Paris train journey. I can't say I'm a particular fan of Hemingway himself but the book is full of many other authors he was known to fraternise with. The entire trip was coloured with an insight to the creatives who lived and visited Paris in the 1920's, 30's and 40's.

February

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly - Jean-Dominique Bauby

A poetic reflection on life and what makes us who we are. It's also one of those stories which puts ones own situation in perspective. We are each of us so very lucky to have a human life and every opportunity we make for ourselves, no matter what our situation.

Big Stone Gap - Adrianna Trigiani

This book reminded me of my childhood somehow. It was the sort of chick-flick storyline in films I'd go to see with my mum and her best friend. It was a bit fluffy but comforting in it's own way.

No Time To Lose - Pema Chodron

A re-read. I have read this book four times now and each time I do something different sticks in my head. I don't think I can explain how beautiful it is to read and I don't know it's a book I can actually recommend as it might be a bit like suggesting someone read the bible. If you need to read this book it will find you, I'm sure.

March

Hickory, Dickory, Dock - Agatha Christie

I've never before read an Agatha Christie, but she is an English Institution and as my partner has every book she's ever written it seemed a natural choice. I chose this title for the illustration on the cover (A way of choosing novels which I can find no fault.) and it starred the delightfully endearing Poirot. Christie's way of creating characters is marvellous and I think this really was the perfect choice as my first Christie novel to embark upon.

Nietzche, a Graphic Guide - Laurence Gane & Piero

I understand many people are dubious about the merit of graphic novels as 'book'. Many believe this is just a glorified description for a comic book but I disagree. The best way I've found to explain it is with a comparison to television programs. A comic book is much like a soap opera. It might have the same cast of characters but the plots change drastically in a short period of time and the stories are never ending and often become repetitive. A graphic novel is more like a mini-series. It has a distinct beginning, middle and end. Graphic Novels: The Sandman Series, Maus. Comic Books: X-Men, Archie

In this case I'd found a sort of biography/study of Nietzche accompanied by the artwork of Piero. It was thought provoking and started me thinking that it would be an awful lot of fun to be a philosopher.

Cat Amongst Pigeons, Murder is Easy and Dead Man's Folly- Agatha Christie

I did a small binge on the Christie novels and got a bit of a headache. I do love her character development but I've never been a huge fan of mysteries. I decided to take a break.

April

Blackberry Wine - Joanne Harris

Unfortunately Joanne Harris is not as well known as she should be. Most people do know her work and don't even realise it. She is the genius behind Chocolat (Although my favourite novel by her is The Five Quarters of the Orange) and Blackberry Wine does have a nod to the characters in that novel.

I really do love the way she writes. Her stories are brilliant and this did not disappoint.

Wasting Police Time - PC Copperfield (Alias)

An airport novel based on a blog kept anonymously over a year by a member of the the English police force. A light, amusing read that got a bit whiney in bits but didn't fail to entertain.

The Psychology of Happiness - Samuel S. Franklin

I picked this book up on a visit to Cambridge, with a discount thanks to a friend. It was fantastic as it expressed so much of what I have found and believe in with Buddhism without the Buddhist language. I often struggle with wanting to share my thoughts on living a good, happy life with people without it coming across as preaching. I like to say that the teachings are the same but the packaging can be of your choosing. This book packaged my thoughts in a different way and I am grateful to Franklin for writing it. I was also pleased as punch to get an email from him when I mentioned the book in an earlier blog entry.

May

Eats, Shoots and Leaves - Lynne Truss

I picked this up whilst in Amsterdam. It was delightful to read although I wish it had covered a bit more, such as the use of * and /.

June

Gentlemen and Players - Joanne Harris

I love the diversity of her work. This was quite tense but in that wonderful captivating way. I couldn't out the book down but at the same time I didn't want it to end so I tried stretching it out as much as possible. As you can see from May and June I was quite busy. Reading was low on my list and I found myself only able to do so for the ten minutes before I fell asleep each night. I do not recommend this particular tale for helping one drift off to sleep. I think it actively kept me awake a few nights, but still, it was well worth the story.

...To Be Continued...